Let’s talk about mental health. No, I mean REALLY talk about mental health. Why not? Oh, because it’s too taboo, we shouldn’t talk about it? “Let’s just keep it hush hush,” was a common quote I heard growing up. Are we our parents’ parents and not supposed to say a word about how we’re feeling or what we’re thinking? What if we want to kill ourselves? Can we not speak up and talk to someone?  

Give me a break. It’s 2023, and people are leaving us in droves. It’s time to be open to a conversation about mental health and the struggles billions of us face each day.  

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, in 2020, 45,979 people died by suicide, or one every 11 minutes. Those 45,979 people felt like they couldn’t take this life any longer, so they took their own. For every death, there are 275 more who seriously considered suicide. Does one conversation with someone else change their decision to die? Maybe not. Maybe so. Either way, this way of thinking, that we cannot talk about mental health issues must come to an end.  

I must imagine those 45,979 people have at least one person who cares about them; a family member, a friend or even an acquaintance. You can’t tell me those people wouldn’t be here today if they truly realized how much they were loved and cared for by those around them.  

We must pay attention to warning signs of depression and relay the message loud and clear that today, more than any other day in the history of the world, there are more resources than ever before for those suffering from mental illness. In the United States, anyone can dial 988 from any smartphone and be connected to someone 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year. Someone will always answer. I know because I called. On Christmas.  

Thursday, Feb. 23, 2023, was #HelplinesAwarenessDay2023, a hashtag created by Helplines Partnership in the United Kingdom to “provide England’s first-ever Helplines Awareness Day.”  

Helplines Awareness Day 2023 

Paula Ojok, CEO of Helplines Partnership says, “Helplines Partnership strives to raise awareness of the amazing work helplines do every day, which often goes unnoticed. We wanted to create an awareness day to ensure we continue to grow our message of how vital helplines are.” 

“The recent pandemic, cost-of-living crisis and other factors have left many people feeling isolated, awaiting support, advice or even treatment. However, helplines continue to be there, throughout the day and night, as a safety net for us all, whatever we may present with. As the membership body, we now want to support helplines by raising awareness and support for their services.”  

This new day of awareness prompted organizations from across the pond to chime in on Twitter. 

I lost a college teammate in 2000 to suicide. She didn’t have to die. To this day, I’ll never understand why. She didn’t leave a note. After she died, we all mourned in our separate ways and went on with our lives. I still remember the last time I saw her walking on campus. She was too far away from me to say anything, so we didn’t speak. What if we would’ve? Could our conversation have saved her? I’ll never know.  

The recent suicides of celebrities Naomi Judd, Stephen “tWitch” Boss and Kyle Jacobs make us wonder what went wrong. They seemed to have it all. Do those deaths get your attention?  

The next time someone seems a bit “off,” or you sense something is wrong, simply ask them how they are doing. Probe more, and then listen. You’d be amazed at the answers you get.  

We can also use a “love first, hate less” mindset in our everyday lives. It’s not the end-all-be-all solution, but it’s a start. We do not show each other enough love on a daily basis. To prove my point, get in your vehicle and drive in any major city in the United States and observe other drivers. We are an angry, unforgiving society that refuses to get help.  

Ah, get help. But how can we when it’s so terribly difficult to get insurance companies to even cover the cost of one therapy visit. “She’s not an in-network provider.” “You have an $8,500 deductible that you must meet before we will cover the cost of your therapy visits.” Seriously, is it too much to ask to cover my mental health issues when my healthcare premium is through the roof? My insurance company can’t even fully cover the cost of a twice-a-month, hour a pop therapy session?  

You cannot tell me that the top five health insurance companies, who rake in BILLIONS of dollars in profits, cannot afford to put some of our hard-earned premium dollars toward a few more visits to a psychiatrist or a few therapy sessions per month, or possibly two out-patient mental health treatments per year? Of course, they can, but they won’t. Why share their billions of dollars with a few million customers? The CDC states funding mental healthcare is more than worth their while. 
 
“The financial toll of suicide on society is also costly. In 2019, suicide and nonfatal self-harm cost the nation nearly $490 billion in medical costs, work loss costs, value of statistical life, and quality of life costs. Suicide is preventable and everyone has a role to play to save lives and create healthy and strong individuals, families, and communities. Suicide prevention requires a comprehensive public health approach.” – CDC  

Here’s my push for a more comprehensive public health approach. If insurance companies started providing pristine mental health coverage across the United States (and across the world, for that matter), the following would happen:  

1. More people would take advantage of the coverage and seek mental health treatment. 

2. Societal conversations about our mental health issues would become more of the norm as we would be taking better care of ourselves.  

3. Fewer people would commit suicide because they would be heard, cared for and understood better when going through a crisis.  

The time is NOW to open our minds, hearts and ears to listen to those around us. Someone you know is struggling right now. Make that call, send that text and ask a simple question, “How are you really doing?” Their answer to you may save their life. Isn’t that worth a conversation?